Changing Habits

This picture quote from Mark Twain goes “Habit is Habit, and not be thrown out the window by any man, but rather coaxed down the stairs a step at a time” got a lot of response recently suggesting it is a common thing. (Actually I think all struggles are common, we all have them, only the degree varies).

Anyway it got me thinking maybe we struggle with habits because we underestimate them.
I have read self-help books and listened to personal trainers that exhort us to “Go hard”, “Smash the habit”, “Grasp the nettle”, etc. In other words defeat our habits by taking BIG action, radical action.

The Go Hard or Go Home philosophy, If you don’t go hard you already failed and you’re a pussy.

Now I am not suggesting that, that doesn’t work for a minute and if you want to, and can do that, then go for it, and good luck. My observation is, that only works for some people. There are a lot of other more gentle souls that, when faced with this kind of aggressive language, just find ways of procrastinating, making excuses and never getting started.

Changing Habits Slowly

Mark Twain recognized this and is encouraging us to see habits as something we can coax or gradually work on, and if that works for you then go for that. I’ve been losing weight gradually for several weeks now, not going crazy at it, but as long as every time I weigh myself, I am heading in the right direction, then I’m happy, I know I can sustain what I am doing and success is inevitable over time.
The same mindset can be applied to many endeavours, whether it is success over a habit, success with finance, or business, very often the only thing we can do to fail, is rush at something, get disheartened and then end up giving up.
The secret to success is often not a sudden rush of blood, sweat and tears rather it comes as the result of sustained and consistent effort.

Make your decisions just once

Sometimes we have setbacks in along the journey to our goals. Lets say I decide I am going to give up smoking. A week later while I’m out at the pub I make a poor decision and accept a cigarette from a friend. The next morning I can beat up on myself and tell myself I failed, see myself as weak and tell myself it’s all too hard. Or I can stay with my original decision to give up smoking and simply carry on acting on that decision despite that one lapse. Which of these mindsets will eventually get me to my destination? The one that says make a decision once and stick with it of course.